DBT Self Help

No, this week I am not going to ask you to think about the eggs you buy in the supermarket, this week I would like you to consider getting no help, support or advice at all for your BPD. Just letting it run free through your life and letting it ruin anything it wishes. There is a very good reason why 75% of people with BPD will make at least one suicide attempt in their lifetime and over 50% will try and take their own lives more than once. This is not a disorder you can let live free-range in your mind, you need to deal with it! But just for one week, let’s imagine you do…

Week 44: Free-Range

I once asked a large Facebook group of BPD sufferers to sum up what it feels like to have BPD in one word. The words they used were: Lost, Emptiness, Exhausting, Misunderstood, Confusion, Tiring, Unpredictable, Drained and many others. What you might find interesting is that you can sum up all those words in just one three-letter word! That word is “meh”. That is not me using that word to dismiss the symptoms of BPD, it’s me trying to summarize them all together. The word “meh” means “expressing a lack of interest or enthusiasm” or “uninspiring; unexceptional.” and that is how many people describe themselves when they have BPD! It makes you feel worthless, empty and lost.

So taking those descriptive words and letting your BPD have free roam means you might well carry on feeling tired, lost and empty which will only lead to dark thoughts and even deeper feelings of helplessness. Given such a high percentage of those with BPD who commit suicide, you can probably see that letting your BPD loose is not going to end well and will probably cost you your life. YES! BPD really is that serious and unless you get the help you need you are left with a 1/4 chance of not committing suicide which is a truly scary number.

The point I am getting at is that no-one can afford to sit back and let BPD take over their lives because it might well end the very life you are trying to live. The same goes for any mental health issue or indeed any problems that might be causing you distress. So you tried talk therapy once and it didn’t work. You went to a therapist once but didn’t like them. Or maybe you skimmed through a self-help book and it didn’t help at all. The truth is you can’t go on as you are because suppressing or even ignoring your heightened emotional state leads nowhere.

Unless you change your mindset and overall positivity you will forever be feeling “meh” until the word “meh” simply doesn’t cut it when describing your lack of interest in life. You are the one who turned to these self-help pages, you are the one who is trying to better yourself. So take the advice in these pages, listen to advice from your doctor or therapist because they are all trying to help you. I get that some of the mindfulness exercises seem daft at first, but you really have nothing to lose by trying them and implementing them into your life. You got this! You can indeed do this and you can live a mostly normal life. I promise you this is true as I have seen many of my own clients with BPD become happier, better people. And all I did was teach them the same things you are reading here.


This Week’s Homework: This week I would like you to try the half-hour meditation in the video above. While some people don’t like meditation it can be a great way to ground yourself and this week I would like you to try a full Body Scan. You don’t need to have anything with you other than a small space to meditate in and even beginners can do it. A typical Body Scan runs through each part of the body, paying special attention to the way each area feels. So listen to the words being said in the video and do so sat down comfortably without any distractions if possible.

Week 43: Life in The F.A.S.T. Lane Week 45: Fixing Your Schemas

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